This is Not Home

“Grief is like a long valley, a winding valley where any bend may reveal a totally new landscape.”
-C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

Throwback picture of Pops and my brothers and I (circa 1993?)

I am a C.S. Lewis geek and because of this, I will almost always side with Lewis on matters of faith and theology, but in light of the recent events in my life, I am going to side with Lewis on his observations of grief as well. In the span of two weeks, my grandpa (who from here out will be called by his real name: Pops) and a colleague, friend, fellow youth minister, and mentor passed away unexpectedly.

Lead Through Love: Pre-retreat reflections

Tomorrow is the retreat that my friend and I have been working on for months. I thought that since we want tomorrow to be an uplifting and transformative experience, I better start some serious reflecting and praying on the retreat motto: Lead Through Love.

When I think about leading... I think about Jesus. When I think about Jesus... I think about love. When I think about love... I think about the cross. When I think about the cross... I think about Dawson. Dawson made me think about the cross in a new way, but let me set the stage a little bit. When I graduated in 2010 from Aquinas College with my B.A., I did what every college graduate dreams-- I got a job. The job I got was the job that every theology major probably expects: baby-sitting. We aim high in theology.

A Theme for Music, a Theme for Life

Yup... Those are my brothers.

I am blessed to have two brothers who know me very well, and each gave me iTunes gift cards for Christmas (Jonny also gave me Rickle’s Pickles, but I think they deserve a post all to themselves). I was a little slow redeeming those cards, but after I started purchasing my music, I realized that there is definitely a theme to the songs I purchased. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that it is more than just a theme that runs through my music, but it’s a theme that runs through my life: HOPE.

Give Thanks

Yesterday I attended the funeral of an 18 year old young woman. I have to say I was shocked when I heard that she had passed as a result of injuries sustained in a car accident. I was even more confused as to why someone with such a bright future and such a loving family would be taken away from this earth so suddenly. I was confused, but my confusion no doubt could not compare to that of the family. However, the family amazed me. Yes, there was the confusion and sadness that always accompanies the death of a loved one, especially one so young, but what really struck me was the unwavering faith that this family clung to in this time of grief and sadness.

I was not the only who picked up this amazing example of faith. The celebrant of the funeral mass also picked up on it. In his homily he quoted his grandmother and the words she told him at a funeral he attended when he was young. She said, “Jimmy, thank God for your faith. Thank God for your family. Thank God for your friends.”

In those moments of grief or suffering it is sometimes hard to be thankful. This family was an example of genuine gratitude to all their family members, to their friends, and to the community who supported them in prayer and presence. But most of all they stood solid in their faith. In those moments when we think that we may never feel happy again or that the grief is just too much, we have to cling to our faith. It is our rock, our stronghold.

Be thankful for your faith, and the best way to do that is to turn every moment into a moment for prayer and thanksgiving. Even those moments when it’s hard to see exactly what it is to be thankful for. Give thanks for the fact that God never leaves you in those moments of suffering. Or give thanks to God that Jesus knows what it’s like to suffer and know that he feels your pain. Give thanks for the angels and saints who are more than willing to pray for you.

There’s plenty to be thankful for even in the bleakest of situations. Just remember: “Thank God for your faith. Thank God for your family. Thank God for your friends.”